Flavor of Creativity

I held a snake for the first time this past week. I have touched snakes before, and they are very nice and smooth, but I had never held a snake before. One of my roommates had acquired a snake for a pet recently, a three to four foot corn snake. Beautiful little snake. When I held the snake it was cold; snakes are cold blooded in case you did not know, and the scales underneath felt weird as the snake moved around my arm. The scales on the underside of the snake had what kind of felt like sharp edges, kind of like touching the edge of a piece of firm paper in the wrong way, which usually results in some kind of paper cut. The scales did not create any lesions on the skin or anything, but just felt... well, different when it moved. When it was not moving, the scales on its underside were smooth, kind of like the rest of the snake, but a bit more sleek. I was a little worried that the snake would tighten around my arm like a hungry boa constrictor, but it moved around as if it were slithering on a tree. I knew if I had shown any signs of fear it probably would have started to squeeze, so I stayed calm, which was pretty easy since I was more fascinated by the snake than afraid of it. There is still no chance I will ever hold a larger snake such as a boa constrictor or burmese python, but the experience of actually holding a snake was a fun one. The only part of the snake I was most worried about was the head, because that is where the teeth are.

Fear part3

There were quite a few fears that had a very close relation to some fears I have. There was Dana''s fear of loosing a loved one, Whitney's fear of failure, and Alex's fear of becoming elderly. Dana's fear left an impression on me because I had lost three loved ones who died two weeks apart of each other last year. My heart was so heavy that I had fallen back into depression. I had to remind myself that what they would want for me is to keep living on and keep them in my memory, and be happy for them as they continue on their new journey in the afterlife. Since I had moved out of my parent's house, I constantly think of my family and check in on them every week to see how they're doing. When I first moved out, I did not talk to anyone back home unless they messaged me or called me. Now I am the one who sends the messages. I am still not much for talking over the phone, because I do not like that moment of silence after a good conversation ends and you cannot come up with another conversation starter and you are wondering if the person on the other line is still on the phone, plus you cannot see the person's face. In short, I prefer face to face conversations or messaging or text to talking on the phone. Alex's fear of becoming old, or more the fear of not being able to take care of yourself and having to rely on others to take care of you, is something I have too. I always thought it was just a fear of getting old then dying, but it actually is a fear of losing the capability to care for myself when I am elderly. I would like to be able to move around like some of the people I have seen who are in their eighties moving like they are in their forties. My aunt used to drive and dance up until her last stroke; she had died two weeks after my other two loved ones last year. She was in her eighties pushing ninety, and was a good driver as well as a good dancer. Every time some one offered to help her with something she knew she could do on her own, she would tell them no and do it herself. Pardon me for sounding like today's young people, but my aunt was boss. Seeing how capable she was at her age gives me hope that I will not be handicapped by age. The volunteers who played the role of the elderly and the caretakers were awesome. Your show of the relation between a caretaker caring for and elderly person was quite entertaining. Whitney's fear of failure I responded to the most because I feel the same way about my art work. My art has to be perfect, and if it is not, then I have failed at it. I do try again and again until I get it right, and when I get it right, I never want to touch it again in fear that I will mess it up. Sometimes if it does not turn out the way I want it, I leave it and never touch it again because I do not like it. The drawing Whitney did was an old pencil portrait piece  that she did not want to mess up. For the Fear assignment, she scribbled and blotched over the it with color, which made the piece even more interesting to look at, amazing even. I have suffered quite a few failures that in the past did made me not want to continue, but pushed through anyway. Seeing Whitney's art piece inspired me to play around with different art mediums more, which I will be doing once I unpack all of my art supplies.

Fear part2

When I was explaining to the class my fear, I was expecting them to take it as joke as if it were a pointless fear. I saw some understanding of my fear as I was presenting it. After I finished talking about my fear, it reminded a lot of my classmates of seeing shadows at night moving through the rooms. When the instructor said what my underlining fear was, I had a better understanding of my fear, because the fear I was presenting was only the surface of what my real fear is. The fear I have is still present, and probably always will be because of things I have seen in the past, and some movies are still good at holding that fear today. I think I would have changed the way in which I presented because I feel like the way in which it was delivered to the class made it sound more like a joke than an actual fear. I am glad the class was able to look past the passive remarks I made about my fear, and saw what was really bothering me and had an understanding of it.

Fear, hypothesis of reaction

I expect the class to be slightly confused, maybe even shocked of such a fear. Some people already have an understanding of the fear I have, but others may wonder why I have this fear and that it is a ridiculous fear to have. I have addressed this fear before, but because of that feeling of discomfort of the unknown, this fear continues to be present. Of course this fear is one that is probably good have.

Class take away 10

What stood out to me most in class is when we were on the subject of the human body during us presenting our thoughts of what fear is and why we have fear. We talked of how as soon as one is born, they begin to decay. I thought everyone knew this because is it something that I learned a long time ago, how long ago, I do not remember, but I do remember being told that as the body ages minute by minute, second by second, our body decays. The expressions of shock from some of my fellow classmates in this class kind of made me chuckle. I chuckled because I was shocked they did not know about the body slowly decaying, but for the most part I chuckled because their expressions were priceless. This experience leads me to do things to get reactions. I enjoy most reactions, such as those who are kind of thrown aback on some of the silly little things I do. I find that funny. Reactions that I do not like, which I do not think anyone would like, are aggressive reactions to those silly little things I do, such as yelling at me. One of many reasons for me loving to draw is to see what reactions I get of my drawings, which is true for any artist. Seeing how people react to a piece of art is the most amusing.

What is Fear? Why do we have Fear?

Fear is an emotion that comes from having no understanding of something, which in some cases leads to hate.

It is very common for people to have a fear of the unknown. We do not understand the unknown, whatever it maybe, and because we do not understand the unknown and are unsure of how to get through it, we fear the unknown and try to avoid it.

Class take away 9

What stood out to me in class today was the instructor's outfit and how it tied into her personality. When I first had Beth as an instructor in photoshop, I thought she would be the same old instructor like all the other instructors I have had in the past. When I got to know her a bit more throughout the classes I have had her as an instructor, I began seeing a fun outgoing person. The purple and green outfit she was wearing Monday, expressed how outgoing, bold, and daring she is. She kind of looked like a witch to me. A witch whom's power comes from the earth. I could see her shooting vines out from under her sleeves, and growing other kinds of plants out of the ground to grab hold of an attacker and throw them cross-country. Thanks Beth, you have got my creative juices flowing with your awesome outfit ^.^ Why my instructor's outfit stood out to me the most in class Monday is because she reminded me of how I usually try to dress to my personality. I love wearing a lot of black, and I am most happy when I am wearing black with spikes and studs like the 80s/90s alternative goth style. I have not dressed like that since I graduated high school and was a freshman at IUPUI. I think I will be dressing like that again because it did make me very happy.